Underdog of aging

The fact is that I'm not going to be faster than I used to be. I accept that.

Another fact is that I am a rebel. I do not take facts as they are. I eat them as breakfast. This relates to my identity as a researcher, as an academic scholar. I like to see the opposite sides of things, to dig deep in them and follow the embedded mechanism in order to realize the world. This also means that over and over again I find myself powerless in front of the enormous space of new knowledge, a space that expands continuously. 

But one fact that has pissed me off is the physiological aging which I just can't turn upside down. Being involved in different sports since 1984 I have lived my life through my body and mind. I have faced many ups and downs, just like anyone else. I have enjoyed the epic battle between the joy and disappointment. Thus, becoming more and more aware of that this engine will be slower and slower was devastating at first, but now I'm okay with it. It eases the life. 

When we lived in the USA, I relived my youth. I was part of a group of runners who - each at their own level and motivation - ran workouts and long runs together. I realized that that was what missed to most. It is not the results, but the feeling of being part of a wolf pack. Running early morning workouts in a company of your kind made me realize that it was where it all started in the late 1980s. By that time I jumped from the loneliness of speed skating into running group fulfilled by guys with egos of a teenager and taste for bad music. We ran together through the teenage, on a mountain, on a swamp, in the woods, every where. For me this was particularly huge, since I regenerated myself from a shy person into an annoying loudmouth who I am nowadays. 

Now, when I have an opportunity to join a huge group of local runners on Workout Tuesdays and Fridays, and Sunday's long runs, it is all about happiness. I feel so thankful for these chances even if I'm the old fart around young shiny diamonds. I no longer care that my current anaerobic threshold is soon at the same level with my aerobic threshold in 1997. Yes, this trend is something that I try to slow down, but there's only few things to do. The most important to me right now is to enjoy the journey and live to the fullest. And this is what I shall do. 

So. I just run.

.... and do some triathlons here and there.

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